If you follow me on Instagram, you know my weekend was a little haywire – you’d also have seen that I can’t talk much about it during the investigation.

What I can say is that bad things happen to good people  all. the. time. 

When trauma does occur in our lives, we have to be prepared to deal with it. MS and stress do not mix well.

Stress has been a trigger in all of my flares. I can pinpoint a big event a few months prior to every true relapse I’ve ever had. I know research is lacking on this point, but I can assure you, it happened to me.

This past weekend was a wake up call. I didn’t realize how lacking my coping mechanisms are. My meditation practice has fallen off, I haven’t been journaling or writing like I should, and my diet isn’t top notch either. 

I should have taken my mri results more seriously, and already revamped my lifestyle. Maybe I’m busy, maybe I’m trying to push the results out of my mind, I’m not sure. Whatever it is, I hadn’t changed much in the week or so post results.

Hindsight is always 20/20. I should have started the day I received the results, and I’d have been a little more prepared.

But, let’s be real – there really is no way to truly prepare for traumatic events. Most of the time, they just happen. Life doesn’t care how prepared we think we should be, or even what preparations we’ve made. It’s going to happen regardless.

So, how do we deal? There is no one size fits all to dealing with trauma, of course. But here are the things that have worked for me so far.

5 Tips for Dealing with Trauma

Get Professionals Involved!

You know my favorite tip for dealing with MS in general – build a team of professional providers that you can trust. I think this applies for mental health as well.

I’ve been seeing a counselor every other week since I was diagnosed. I’ve been able to learn new coping mechanisms, talk through my issues with an unbiased observer, and received valuable insights I never would have gotten otherwise. 

When trauma occurs, its especially important to involve a professional counselor to help you wade through the murky waters that inevitably come at times like these. If you don’t have insurance, there are tons of sliding fee scale or completely free services available.

If you live in a rural area, a lot of mental health pro’s offer telecom services for those with transportation issues. However you can, seek out someone who is a professional at navigating these tricky waters.

I had to try out many different counselors before I found my fit, and I’m still always on the look out for new support groups or classes. I have my fair share of horror stories – don’t let yours deter you from taking the biggest step (in my opinion) when dealing with trauma.

Start Meditating Today

Seriously, just do it. (honestly, this is a good idea regardless of recent trauma or not)

Because I just posted about this in my OMS post, I wont bore you with too many details. Leading up to this weekend, I was slowly getting back into my groove. I’ve used a few different apps, but this time I’m going straight for Headspace.

I get a discounted membership because I’m a student, but they have excellent free ones, as well. There are tons of studies on the benefits of meditation – during periods of intense stress, I find it a lot more difficult to do, but the benefits are much more rewarding too.

Find Your Tribe

It’s hard asking for help, but it’s harder dealing with it on your own. If they really love you, they want to help. Trust me.

I’ve always hated asking for help – it was my Achilles heel when I was first diagnosed. I’m glad I learned to ask for help before this past weekend. By being honest with my loved ones about what happened, and what I needed to deal with it, we were all able to cope better.

Opening up is one of the hardest, but best, things you can do in a situation like this. Lean into your loved ones. Speaking of leaning into them – 

Try Out a Hug

When bad stuff happened when you were a kid, who did you want? For most of us, it was our Mom or Dad. Usually, we wanted a hug or to be held. As we grow older, the person we seek comfort from changes. Maybe you want to hug your spouse, your kids, or even a fur baby.

This is one of the first, and most beneficial, coping mechanisms we learn as babies. When we’re being loved and held, we feel safe and secure. The feeling, or need to be held doesn’t change with age, though.

It’s been proven to lower blood pressure, which we know is huge with stress, and elevate our moods. But, it’s also been proven to lessen the likelehood of catching an infection AND less the severity of symptoms if you do get sick.

So, take a chance, and if you can, hug someone. They’ll enjoy it as much as you.

Live Life As Normally As Possible

I know that it doesn’t make much sense – how can the world just go on spinning, and lives keep progressing as normal? Shouldn’t we all get a couple day break, to mourn what was and what’s to come, without having to worry about mundane life? 

How can the bills keep coming, school assignment due dates approach, writing deadlines keep looming? Don’t they know something terrible has happened?

Truth is, life knows, but it’ll keep going on until the fat lady sings. It’s not that the world doesn’t care, it’s that it can’t help but to spin regardless of what happens on it. 

So, we have to as well. As hard as it is, we have to go about daily life. Returning to a routine does help; it can give you a sense of balance when everything seems unsteady. It seems weird at first, but eventually, you find a new normal.

That new normal is the basis on which you can start fresh, or just begin the next chapter.

Either way, these are some of the best tips I’ve found for dealing with trauma. I know this is a super short list – I’ve gathered some tips on dealing with grief, anxiety, and mental health resources in general as well. 

If you find something you like here, share it on Pinterest or Instagram! Or share your thoughts below. I’d love to connect with you.

I hope these help you like they helped me. Until next time,